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Saturday, 19 January 2013

It's really hard to write

I often think of things to write and then I choose not to because I feel repetitive. Caught in the endless hamster wheel, running and running while getting nowhere and becoming more exhausted.

Burning out while simply going through the motions of existing.

I am tired and sad and angry and depressed at the same time. In the same breath at times.

Tears well in my eyes, unexpectedly.

My head pounds. My anxiety is high again.

I had a panic attack that was triggered by seeing a shovel at Walmart the other day. What the fuck was that about?!?!?!?!!!!???

I don't know what else to say.

The groups make sense and what I am learning there seems to help temporarily but so much of what is happening to me these days is just VISCERAL.

What can I do for that?

Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

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